Mafer Merino

An Authentic Take as a Wedding Photographer

One of the questions I get asked the most during meetings is:
“How long does the groom’s getting-ready part take?”
“My fiancé doesn’t want any getting-ready photos… he’s not into pictures.”
And honestly, I get it. It’s more common than you’d think.

As brides, we’re full of emotion. We want to capture everything—the presence of our friends, our sisters, our closest family. We want to live that pre-ceremony moment between nerves and excitement, with music, laughter, a glass in hand, and that dress we’ve dreamed of wearing. We want to feel radiant, surrounded by love, and most of all, we want memories of that moment that feels so deeply ours.

I’ve been in that space, and I completely understand you.

But when we think about our life partner, we often run into what I call the famous male practicality—you know, that thing where they don’t really care for the camera, for posing, or even pausing too long before the ceremony. While we’re riding a rollercoaster of emotions… they’re cool as cucumbers, fully in control and maybe a little intimidated by the idea of “having a camera on them.”

And that’s okay. It’s totally normal.

Grooms usually get ready pretty quickly: shower, suit, fragrance, done. So it can feel unnecessary to photograph that part. But here’s the thing—they deserve their moment too. In their own way, in their own language, and at their own pace.

I’ve had grooms who got married by the beach, and literally an hour before the ceremony, they were out swimming with their friends—chilled, laughing, enjoying the moment. Meanwhile, we’ve been at it for hours—hair, makeup, emotions, messages, logistics… and a dress that needs a full choreography just to get into.

Honestly, I totally agree with that saying:
“At a wedding… be the groom.” 😄

Groom prep usually takes around 30 to 45 minutes. And yes, it’s rare to find a groom who loves being photographed. But when we manage to create a relaxed, real, and spontaneous vibe… everything shifts.

My advice: invite him to spend that time with his best friends. Add a drink, an inside joke, some music. Maybe his dad joins, his brother, or the friend who played matchmaker. There are so many ways to make that moment meaningful for him. And even if he doesn’t say it out loud—believe me, he’ll carry it in his heart.

Some details that can elevate his experience:

• A handwritten letter: Write him a few words and ask someone close to deliver it while he’s getting ready. It’s intimate, unexpected, and deeply emotional—perfect for a meaningful photo moment.
• A gift with a story: A classic watch remains a timeless and symbolic gift. It represents the time you’ve shared and the one you’re about to begin. You could also go for cufflinks, a unique fragrance, or something meaningful between the two of you.
• A first toast: Let him share a drink with his closest friends. The photos from that moment tend to be natural, joyful, and full of real energy.
• A moment with his family: If his dad, mom, or sibling helps him with his jacket or watch, those gestures become memories. They’re not posed—they’re small, meaningful scenes full of love.

The key is shifting the perspective: it’s not about posing or being stiff in front of a camera. It’s about documenting what’s really happening—no frills, just real life.

When couples meet with me and we talk about their wedding, I always share that the way I work is different. I’m not just there to take photos—I’m there to capture what unfolds: the hugs, the glances, the laughter, the silences, the gestures. Photography, to me, is a conversation. And that goes for both of you.

So if you’re planning your wedding and wondering if the groom’s getting-ready part is worth photographing, my answer is:
Absolutely yes—but always in his own language.
Because he’s also part of the story.